Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
