ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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