She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Randomize
