he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Randomize
