oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
