i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
