She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
