Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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