Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
