we made out on top of his cat.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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