Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Randomize