She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize