Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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