I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Randomize
