So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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