Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
