I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
