I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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