doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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