you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
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