why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
