I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Randomize
