fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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