Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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