btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Randomize
