I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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