wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
