I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
