wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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