I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Randomize
