do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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