theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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