The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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