just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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