At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
