jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
