i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
