So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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