I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Randomize
