I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
