there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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