I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
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