Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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