Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
