Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Randomize
