ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
