Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
