Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
