I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize
