doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
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