i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Randomize
